


But Still, I Rise

by RiseoftheBlossom



Series: Commissions [3]
Category: Naruto, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:06:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24257113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RiseoftheBlossom/pseuds/RiseoftheBlossom
Summary: Her first clear memory was waking stark naked and half-submerged in a lake, the sight startling her into moving. There was no pain, no open wounds. Nothing that suggested she had been assaulted in some way – just a weird steam that was slow in dissipating. But her memories had been messed with. That much she was certain.
Relationships: Deidara (Naruto)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Commissions [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1751041
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Commission for aem309

* * *

**Chapter 1**

* * *

It could have been worse than confused solitude, she supposed.

Her other self (or huge ass self, as she oh-so-affectionately dubbed it) had impressive survival instincts that ran into her everyday life, allowing her to make it through the day without dying or receiving serious injuries. For that, she could only be grateful. Going about her day without any memory – not even a name – was infuriatingly difficult. Fortunately for her, the only real issue she'd run into so far was a hungry animal daring to turn its predatory gaze on her, leaving her to run for her life.

The lack of memories was exasperating, though. Given the fact she _could_ formulate coherent thoughts, could still recognise animals (even if she couldn't always put a name to the beast), and knew basic human functions (such as bathing, bladder control, eating, etc), it led her to the belief that it'd been tampered with.

Her first clear memory was waking stark naked and half-submerged in a lake, alone and coated in crusted blood, the sight startling her into moving. There was no pain, no open wounds. Nothing that suggested she had been assaulted in some way – just a weird steam that was slow in dissipating. And why was she so certain her memories were messed with, other than the stuff she'd already mentioned? Well, a pile of clean clothes and boots had lay beneath a grand old tree – what's more, they fit nicely, too. Like the person who'd left them behind knew her size.

It was a disturbing thought that often times made her a tiny bit paranoid, leaving her to triple check her surroundings before risking putting her head down for the night, refusing to go anywhere other than a bush for the bathroom and once or twice (okay, many times – pretty much every other day), she would transform to better scope the area out, ensuring she truly was alone.

She was always alone.

Since waking at the lake, she'd been wandering. Where to? No idea. Why? Well, what was the point in hanging around an area she was unsure of? Why would she stay somewhere when she couldn't guarantee her own safety? There was that and the fact food was scarce – she found herself to be quite the glutton, so for the time being, her stomach was happily steering the way.

Was that something to do with her other self? Probably not. She didn't really feel much of anything while transformed. If she had a purpose – if either of them held a specific purpose – then it was unknown to her. Having a purpose would be nice, though. At least then she'd understand what she was doing with herself rather than wandering aimlessly, only using her need to eat as a guide.

The sight of a disturbance on the dirt path had her pausing in her leisurely walk, eyes narrowing a fraction. It was upon crouching next to what she could only guess as an extensively used pathway that she figured they were footsteps on top of footsteps, distorting the shapes of–

She stood abruptly, lifting her own foot and assessing the vague similarities, eyes widening in surprise.

Human.

It was human footprints!

That _had_ to mean she was close to a town of some sort. It was the first glimpse of civilisation she'd seen in… She wasn't entirely sure. Months, perhaps? It didn't matter. Not really. What mattered was that she could potentially find some kind of lead, or maybe even a sign as to what she was supposed to do with herself. Roaming without a care and without anyone to answer to was great and all, but it grew tiresome and even lonely at some point.

Like the sudden appearance of a path with a destination at the end of it had stirred said loneliness to new heights, she faced the long winding road framed by impossibly tall trees, the sounds of wildlife appearing like cheers in her mind, encouraging her to follow the route.

It didn't matter how long it took. As long as there was _something_ there.

There had to be something there!

Renewed determination aided her in marching forward, only briefly damning her human form for its slowness – had she been in her other form, it would've taken a fraction of the time. However, a small voice in the back of her mind warned that having others see that form would cause nothing but trouble. She supposed, after all, seeing a twenty metre person bulldozing their way through the trees _was_ pretty frightful. Besides, how was she know they wouldn't shoot first, then ask questions? It simply wasn't worth it, especially not when she didn't know the extent of her own powers.

When night fell, she reluctantly dragged herself up the nearest tree and settled down, tugging the thick cloak she'd been left with around herself more securely, chin tucking into her knees.

Setting a fire wasn't impossible for her to do, but the last time she'd done so, that damned, hungry beast had chased her for several miles before finally giving up on her being its lunch. She'd rather not repeat that incident, not if she was able to prevent it.

Thoughts of what could possibly be waiting for her at the end of the dirt road kept her up that night, eyes glued to the twinkling night sky. How many people would be there? Would they be kind enough to assist her? Would they have any reason to fear her? Would any of them be like her? Was it normal to transform?

She'd only ever seen one reaction to her form so far and that was fear, coming from animals. But then again, they didn't really count. Not the small ones she tended to hunt, anyways, since they were normally quite skittish. The big ones worried her a little, but saying that, she supposed it was normal for anything that was suddenly dwarfed to realise it was suddenly no longer at the top of the food chain?

"Maa," she groaned, burying her face further into her knees.

All that talk on food was working up her appetite. If she didn't cut it out and get some sleep, she'd be in trouble in the morning when she returned to the road.

But sleep continued to evade her, so with another groan, she shot to her feet and inwardly assessed her options.

On the one hand, travelling through the night had always eased her nerves somehow, like she possessed the upper hand somehow. Regardless of what was hunting who, if she transformed, she had the advantage hands down. Though, on the _other_ hand, if the town or whatever it was happened to be much closer than anticipated, then nobody would be awake – and she knew _she_ hated being woken up by any kind of disturbances. How likely would people be to leave her out in the cold if she rudely woke them up in the middle of the night?

Staying put was undoubtedly her best option, yet…

Yet she couldn't quite get the excited shake out of her hands, couldn't shake the _need_ to find out the answers regarding her past. There was no telling if the town would be of any use to her, or whether they'd even be welcoming, but she was so freaking tired of wandering. Helplessness was not an emotion she appreciated.

The addicting anticipating got the best of her in the end and she rushed off, determined to make it to the town. If she made it before sunrise, then she supposed she could hold back and rest up in a tree until she heard the town coming to life when its occupants awoke, or perhaps explore it while all was quiet. Then, she would…

She would, what? What did one do in her situation? How did she even go about explaining her situation? _Could_ she?

Slowing her walk to a more leisurely pace, she opened her mouth, frowning at the odd sensation in her throat and noise she was rewarded with.

While making noises wasn't unusual to her, articulating her thoughts _was_. How long had it been since she last had a real conversation? What did she do with her mouth? Was there a certain way she moved it to bring her thoughts to life? Was that even the right saying? How the hell was she supposed to ask for their help when she didn't even know what the hell she was doing?

Still, she'd chosen to push on. There was no use in retreating to a tree now, was there? No. She would keep going until she reached civilisation, _then_ she would figure how to solve her whole lack of communications skills situation. There was no use in agonising over it – that wouldn't change anything, would it? All it'd achieve was dropping her into that black hole that was despair.

Mute or not, she had to keep going, had to push aside her anxieties, had to…

Had to…

So lost in her inner ramblings, she hadn't even realised she'd broken out of the forest until she was forced to come to an abrupt halt. The raging heat that oozed from the small town before her was enough to make her skin ache in a weird way, like she was too close to her food while it was cooking and the smell was… Warily, she sniffed the air, only to cringe at the scent of burning flesh, a smell that was vaguely, hauntingly familiar to her.

What on earth could have happened? The path had been recently used! She could tell it had been. So why? Why was the town in ruins? Why was it burning to ash right in front of her?

Movement to the left of the town captured her attention and she watched as a blond man on some form of white beast zoomed through the air, grinning while raising a hand, lips moving with a word she couldn't understand before–

The responding explosion knocked her off balance and she raised her arms, hand instinctively reaching for her neck until she reminded herself she wasn't in that form, so it was useless. Damn, though. They'd shaken her pretty badly for her to… just…

"Oh?"

They were fast, she noticed too late, already struggling against a rope of some sort wrapping around her.

"Is this your town?"

_What a cold voice,_ she couldn't help but notice with another cringe. It set her on edge, her survival instincts telling her to get the hell away from him. He was like the vicious beast that had tried chasing her, only unlike the person before her, it'd been weighed down by its heavy body and–

"Bear," she blurted out.

That was what it was called! That was what chased her.

It was all still there, she realised after a brief moment of pause where the strange poppy haired man stared at her. Just lost, like she was.

"Bear?" he repeated, though without any kind of emotion to his voice.

She'd said that out loud? Damn, she was taking quite the leap, wasn't she?

Struggling momentarily, she glanced downwards at her confinements, studying them for a moment before she was flexing her muscles and straining against them, taking all of two seconds to snap his restraints.

"Interesting," he murmured and she saw the way his brown eyes travelled down her body, once more reminding her of the bear. "You feel no pain or general unwellness?"

What did that mean? She frowned and followed his gaze, raising an eyebrow at the steam that coated her. So far, it'd only done so when she'd transformed out of her huge ass self and was injured at some point – a rarity. Why was it happening now?

Like that even mattered. What mattered was asking the weirdo with the dead eyes how she went about finding out about her past, or, at the very least, what had happened to the town.

Obviously, he'd had a hand in it. Standing so calmly throughout the destruction was unusual – not to mention he had the same style of cloak as the terrorist. Fully black with red clouds and high collars, unlike her own. Hers was green with a hood rather than a collar. Did that mean each cloak held some kind of importance? Obviously, for them to wear the same kind meant they held some form of comradeship, so was there others of her kind? Would they wear the same cloak as her own? Was that how she was supposed to spot them?

"It seems you are immune to my poison. You should have dropped by now," continued the man and she realised she'd unfocused on whatever he'd been talking about. Was the only reason she zoned back in because of the blond who suddenly descended from the sky on his weird animal? "That could go either way for me."

What was he talking about?

Features tugging awkwardly as she tried to formulate her thoughts, she raised her green cloak and pointed to his, hoping he would figure it out because like hell she knew what she was doing. She was by no means stupid, but at that moment in time, she may as well have been.

"What's this?" the second guy said with a laugh. "She wants to join us?"

Join them?

"Either she will be a pain if others discover she's immune to my poison, or she could come in handy as a weapon."

"Her? A weapon?"

Why were they discussing her like she wasn't even there?

"Yes," the redhaired man muttered and stepped forward, closer to her. "You'll be a fine addition."

She looked between them, smile faltering as her cloak slipped from her grasp.

"…Eh?"


	2. Chapter 2

They were relentless.

Grimacing at the strange pipe that clipped her shoulder, she launched herself backwards, doing her utmost to outrun the two strange men.

They were on a completely different level and managed to keep up with her without an issue. Almost like they weren't even human as one soared by her on his strange creature, the other taking a simple, extra leap to run alongside her.

"You're already breathless," the red-haired man said without pause. If she were to talk while running at a dead sprint, she was certain she wouldn't sound as composed as he did. "And you cannot use chakra, from the looks of things."

Chakra? What was that? Wait, wasn't it supposed to have something to do with the inner powers, or–

Inner power.

Damn, she really was in way over her head if they scared her that much to make her forget about her other self.

"A civilian with odd healing abilities, perhaps?"

Before the man could continue his analysis of her (like they were sat in an examination office rather than her running for her damn life), she surprised the pair of them by raising a hand to her mouth, biting down hard enough to draw blood.

He immediately put distance between them when a bolt of lightning struck the ground where she was standing, lighting up the area around them, threatening to blind them all.

At the summoning, her huge ass self took over, the sudden transformation leaving her breathless though she did not fight it. Instead, she shut her eyes, watching through the eyes of her other self.

The two men were staring up at her, but she couldn't read their expressions even though the blond was certainly more open than the redhead. They'd come to a halt in their pursuit, skidding in the dirt before taking surprisingly huge leaps backwards to put as much distance between them as possible.

But being twenty metres tall made that pretty futile, didn't it?

"An Akimichi?" she heard one of them demand.

Standing to her full height, she glowered down at the two men, now confident in her survival rate because _surely_ , she now stood a chance against them?

"I have never seen one expand to this size."

Why had they even attacked her? Had she somehow presented herself as a threat? Was it her lack of communication skills that caused the issue? The blond one had said she'd wanted to join them after gesturing to their cloaks – perhaps that was the issue?

Whatever it was, she wasn't sticking around to find out.

She needed to survive to find out the truth.

Causing them both to (hopefully) panic, she leapt straight over them in a single stride, making the ground quake threateningly with each of her stomps as she darted away and back into the forest. While being as huge as she was made it close to impossible to stay hidden, the trees were easily twice the height of her in some places and once mingled with them, she would be able to change back and hide, just for a while in case they–

Instinctively, her hand came to the back of her neck the second the air around her became distorted, but she was completely unprepared for the force that threw her straight off her feet and into the nearest tree. It cracked under the assault, soon collapsing into several other trees and taking her with it. Still, throughout it all, her hand never left the back of her neck, keeping her weakness guarded.

"If this is an Akimichi, then that means Konoha is involved."

Akimichi? Konoha? Were they people's names? Organisations, perhaps? Did that mean those two _did_ know about what she was or what had happened to her?

Hand falling blindly behind herself, she tried to find something that would help her in getting back up but had to settle on warily releasing her neck to steady her balance while standing. Even though her huge ass self was impressive, it was something she wasn't yet used to and the sudden shift in body mass was difficult to master, especially when she didn't know what the hell she was doing.

Even if they did know something, why would she want to follow or trust them? They'd just decimated an entire town and chased her even in her other form – clearly, they didn't fear her like she'd hoped that they would, which was ridiculous because who in their right mind didn't fear someone who was twenty metres tall?

Then again…

They didn't seem all there. The blond one had laughed when the attack had knocked her on her ass and the other seemed way too calm in the situation, like he had no reaction whatsoever, but what kind of human didn't feel anything?

Once more standing tall, she narrowed her eyes when the blond flew higher and higher, intent on reaching her face.

She gritted her teeth and swung, aggravated by her own slow movements as he managed to dodge the majority of her attacks.

And then something floated into her peripheral, time seeming to slow down as the strange white creature came to a halt in front of her eyes for just a second before promptly exploding, the man's yell lost in the sound of the deafening _boom_. She didn't even have the chance to look shocked as she was sent stumbling backwards, catching herself just in time before she could trip over the previously broken tree, ears ringing painfully.

Damn it. What was the point in being able to transform if she was still outclassed? Had she always been that way? Was it because she didn't have her memories that she couldn't fight to the best of her ability? Had she still had them, would she have stood a chance?

"Oh? You can withstand that much, yeah?" the blond was jeering at her, his hair blowing back as he hurtled towards her at a speed she couldn't keep up with. "How about this?"

_Shit–_

Her hands came to her neck and she closed in on herself, willing with all her heart that that wasn't the end for her – it couldn't be. It was simply too tragic. She needed to figure out what happened to her and why and who the hell was responsible.

She couldn't die to those two clowns!

Stunning them, just as the creature reached her, she lunged to her feet and jumped, putting everything she had into the movement to avoid the blast.

She didn't know what the hell he was taking to be able to send kamikaze creatures her way and she didn't care enough to find out.

All she knew was that she _had_ to survive!

Landing with a vindictive growl, she crouched low and sprung again, going against the natural instinct of needing a more open space to fight in such a humongous form by hurtling herself between trees. Each one she landed on groaned and collapsed under her weight, but the moment they began their fall, she launched herself off them and to the next one.

_Now_ , she growled inwardly upon seeing an opening as she had him confused with her acrobatics.

Her heavy body protested as she threw herself at him but she ignored it, her fingers curling around the blond and squeezing tight, refusing to let him go. She landed noisily back onto the ground and created another dangerous quake, but she paid it no mind since it didn't effect her own balance, bringing him up to meet her wide-eyed glare of cold fury.

A single blue eye met hers, the other covered by a thick fringe of hair and she was startled by the intense urge to chomp down. A similar feeling she experienced while hunting threatened to overwhelm her – to the extent where she brought her other hand to join the first, the pair gripping him tightly – and she shook with exertion, attempting to control herself.

_But…_

The man's eye was wide when she licked her lips, her heart's pounding reverberating throughout her huge ass body.

She swallowed in a sad attempt to control her salivating.

"O-Oi, you–" He cut himself off, head thrown back with a sudden shout of pain.

It was only in that moment that she realised how valiantly he was struggling to escape her grip and she eyed him curiously, pitting him up in her head against the animals she'd hunted and eaten.

Was it really so different?

_Just a little taste…_

To hell with it, she decided and opened her mouth, intent on ending it once and for all. They were going to kill her, after all. Why shouldn't she eat them?

Wait.

_Them_.

Shit, she'd forgotten about the redhead! Where–

She was forced to release the blond when his friend came to his rescue, the feeling of grains tickling around her neck frightening her as she realised she'd left herself wide open. Uncaring of what happened to her meal when dropped from almost twenty metres, she reached up, clawing at the grains of what she presumed to be sand, terrified when they began to harden into a choker, of sorts.

It wrenched her head back, seemingly controlled by something and soon enough, her clawing was put to a stop when more sand wrapped around her wrists. That time, however, she could see clearly what it was and at the sight of the strange black sand, she fought even harder to free herself, yelling out angrily and in fear, unaware of the blond covering his ears at her screams.

The fight halted dramatically when the redhead reappeared, landing on her cheek without using anything to hold onto. But how was that possible? How could he stand on her face like that without falling to his death?

His dead brown eyes bore into hers, searching her features. "What a contrast to who you were prior to this transformation," he muttered in what she assumed was intrigue. Too frightened to move now that she was unable to protect her weak spot, she simply stared back with a wide, fearful gaze. "Other than the expansion of their bodies, an Akimichi does not change their appearance. Their faces remain the same. You, on the other hand, are now repulsive to look at."

_Bastard…_

"What's more, from what I know of the clan, despite being so hungry all of the time, they are not cannibals." He leaned impossibly closer to look into just one of her eyes, studying her. "How intriguing."

Feeling he was relatively distracted by examining her eye, she began struggling again only to gasp in pain when her knees were targeted, forcing her to fall first to her knees, then flat on her front when something attacked her back.

Their surroundings were once more disturbed by the sudden fall, but she didn't have the chance to focus on what was blown away from the shockwave of her descent.

Grimacing, she turned her face out of the dirt.

"It seems you have no communication skills in either form," the redhead continued like nothing had happened.

She warily opened her eyes to look at him, overwhelmed with helplessness as he walked up to her face. He didn't stand on her that time, instead remaining a few feet away from her.

"Who cares?" the blond demanded. It was only then that she realised he was standing on top of her head. Obviously, he'd been the one to knock her down. "Just let me kill her for trying to eat me, yeah. We've got places to be."

_This isn't fair,_ she thought to herself.

All she'd wanted was to find out the truth.

"Oh?"

She didn't ask for any of this.

She just wanted to know who she was and why she could transform into a different being.

"Tears?" the blond questioned before promptly stomping on her head repeatedly, yelling angrily, "You should be crying, yeah! You tried _eating me! What the hell was that even about, huh?_

"Knock it off, Deidara."

But he didn't, instead directing his anger at the redhead as he snapped, "Easy for you to say. You weren't the one almost _cannibalised!"_

"Perhaps it was a self-defence mechanism?"

"You saying this isn't actually a person?"

"Don't be ridiculous. Of course it's still a person."

"Tch." Giving one last stomp, Deidara hopped off her head to join his partner in staring at her destitute, teary features. "Now what? Are you going to keep her as a pet, yeah?"

Why were they talking about her like she wasn't even there when the redhead had _just_ stated that she _was_ still a person? Didn't that grant her some kind of warmth? Then again, why would she deserve anything like that after almost allowing her instincts to overrule her? That guy must have been terrified.

The redhead hummed thoughtfully, like he was contemplating going through with Deidara's question and it sent hard, cold dread straight to her stomach, where it knotted up and weighed her down sickeningly. It was a good thing she hadn't eaten him, otherwise she would've thrown him back up.

They weren't human, were they? That had to be what it was. They weren't human and that was why they were so fast and strong and so incapable of showing just an ounce of mercy. They'd slaughtered a village, had chased her down and _threw freaking bombs at her_ despite being essentially defenceless against them _._

No.

They weren't human.

And they sure as hell were not making her their pet!

Just as Deidara drew closer to her, she twisted against the restraints and snapped her teeth at him. Thankfully, it gave her the space she needed for he startled, leaping backwards and returning to the strategic distance the other guy employed.

"Oi."

Angrily, she looked to the redhead, baring her teeth at him like the bear had her.

"You're not helping yourself here."

Like she cared! They were monsters.

"I am deciding on your fate, which is more than you deserve after attempting to eat my partner."

Deidara harrumphed at that, smirking. "Thanks, Sasori-no-Danna."

He said nothing that indicated he even heard his thanks. Keeping his lifeless gaze glued to her, he murmured, "Transform back."

And leave herself completely defenceless against them?

"H… He…"

"Oh?" Sasori stepped forward, head tilting downwards like he was trying to meet her eye. "So, you can talk?"

Not without a great strain, apparently. She was physically shaking with the effort, her teeth chattering whenever she tried to mimic the way they moved their mouths to talk. How did they make it seem so effortless? Like the words just flew out of them without a second thought?

"Is she an invalid?" questioned Deidara and he squinted at her, lip curling. "She looks-"

"Quiet, Deidara," Sasori ordered sharply before crouching, eyes never leaving hers. "What are you trying to say?"

Gods, what indeed? All her struggling was making it harder to remember, to put together what she wanted to say.

"…n-nyo…"

No, that wasn't right. She could tell by the faint frown that was marring Deidara's features. He looked between her and Sasori, seeming irritated by the sudden infatuation.

"Just take her back to Ame with us, yeah. Uchiha's there. You'll get your answers."

Ame? Uchiha? What the hell was that and why did she suddenly fear it? It had to be because of the way Deidara said the name, like it was the worst curse word known to man – or like it would dirty him merely _whispering_ the name. The hatred and disgust were impossible to ignore, setting her further on edge.

"We cannot take her as she is."

Deidara sighed with a growing frustration that scared her. "Then knock her out, yeah. Most things revert back when they're out cold."

Was that one way for her to turn back? Honestly, she wasn't even sure how she did it herself. She just… did. As easily as when she transformed into her huge ass self. It was something she never considered until that moment.

Damn it, she _needed_ the those answers.

"Just hurry up and decide, will you?"

His approach had her fight returning tenfold and she grunted while straining against the odd black sand, crying into the dirt when it bit into her skin harshly, cutting her deeply.

"N-N-N-N-"

"She's pissing me off," muttered Deidara darkly, hands tugging open his cloak and soon digging into the pouches on his hips. "What's the point in keeping her?"

"She may come in handy."

"Handy? How?" he demanded disbelievingly. A piercing glare was shot his way when the redhead noticed what he was doing, but it didn't stop Deidara. "It's not like something as weak as her can take on tailed beasts – she'd probably try eating them and getting herself killed, yeah!"

She gritted her teeth, face scraping in the dirt as she fought through the biting pain, ignoring the blood from her wrists as it soaked her back.

_She couldn't give up!_

_Don't give up!_

"N- _N_ -!"

They both stopped their arguing abruptly, eyes growing wide as she finally managed to escape the restraints on her wrists. Her hands fell motionlessly to the ground with sickening thuds and while it terrified her having no hands, she knew she couldn't falter.

" _No!"_

Staggering to her feet, she stared them down coldly, her gaze murderous.

_She wasn't going to die._

_Not today._


	3. Chapter 3

What the hell happened? Where was she?

Grimacing as sharp pains shot throughout her body, she glanced downwards, only to blanch at the bloodied stumps where her legs had once been. Steam surrounded the savagely cut limbs, but the sight did little to ease her sudden nausea.

_They'd crippled her._

Dried blood coated her thighs all the way up to her hips, she realised belatedly, though not the ends of her stumps–

Bile cut off her gasp with a strangled gurgle when she found it wasn't only her legs missing – her right arm was gone. Completely.

"Oh? Looks like she's waking up."

 _Don't get your hopes up,_ she thought wearily as the world started to spin.

* * *

The next time she awoke, she was fastened securely to some form of wooden carrier, its jostling causing a great discomfort that she fought against sounding.

All she could see was the reddening sky as the sun set above her and despite it being obscured in places due to the placement of branches and leaves, the brief glimpses of its colour was enough to bring the memories of her injuries to the forefront of her mind. Well, that and the steam that continued to cover her.

What had happened? How had she received such brutal wounds? Why couldn't she remember anything? And how was she back in her normal body again?

Even though the world continued to spin sickeningly as she lifted her head slightly, she fought through it, stomach churning when she caught snippets of the two men's conversation.

"You used too much chakra."

"She's strong, yeah."

"That is no reason to be reckless," he was chastised, and it took her a moment to realise it was the redhead who was speaking. The only reason she figured it out was because of the annoying add-on to the other man's sentences. "We are technically still on our mission."

There was an aggravated sigh, one that was almost covered by the sound of scraping. Was that the carrier she was on? Or was the blond on one too for using too much energy?

"Think she'll be secure there?"

"Concerned?"

He barked out a harsh laugh that instinctively had her recoiling. "In all honesty, I hope she falls off and dies, yeah." A pause, then a quiet admittance of, "I just don't want her turning into that monster again."

"Because you used too much chakra," Sasori muttered.

"…Yeah."

She was agitated by the sudden silence that befell the pair, for she wanted more information to try and formulate a plan of sorts to get the hell away from them. Already, she knew Deidara had no energy and from the sounds surrounding them, she was guessing he was being carried similarly to her (though more than likely sat up, since he sounded proud). What she _needed_ to know was whether they were injured, and whether she could use said injuries to her advantage.

Calm was key, she told herself while steeling her nerves to look down at her body once more. She had to swallow the bile at the sight of her severed limbs, forcing herself to continue looking and when she found they were different from before, she narrowed her gaze.

While still covered in blood from her thighs upwards, the stumps were longer, in a sense. Like they were growing. One of her hands was back too, despite the fact she _knew_ she'd cut them both off in her escape attempt. Honestly, at that point, she was done trying to figure out what the hell was even happening to her, because it felt like a vicious cycle of never-ending questions that stressed her out. As soon as she _thought_ she pinned down one answer, some kind of predicament happened, causing a devastating number of questions being added to the list.

"What is she?" Deidara demanded harshly, like he too was as lost as she was. "You sure this isn't some kind of tailed beast?"

"Did you see any tails?"

What in the hell was a tailed beast? Clearly, given that he asked if she was one, it was some form of gigantic monster and since the clue was in the name, she kind of got they had tails. But why were they spoken about with mixed emotions? Why did Deidara sound equally curious as he was frustrated?

"Why was she _naked_?" he asked in a hiss, perhaps pretending he hadn't even heard the condescending question. "I get there was nothing there, yeah. But _why_?"

"Does a woman's body make you uncomfortable?"

"Are you-" Deidara cut himself off with a gurgled sounding gasp. "There was nothing there to get uncomfortable over!"

 _Pervert,_ she inwardly growled.

"You don't sound so sure."

"What would _you_ know?" he demanded with a growing anger that made her uncomfortable. "You're not even a living person."

What the hell did _that_ mean?

Fear had her shuddering delicately and her head fell back against her wooden carrier, eyes shutting to block out the red sky.

From listening to snippets of their current conversation and previous ones during the altercation, she knew that they were taking her to someone who could apparently give them answers. To Uchiha – whatever the hell that was.

No, not whatever.

Something about the way Deidara had uttered his name set her on edge, especially when comparing it to the way he spoke of the tailed beast. Was he equal amounts of dangerous? Was he to be trusted? Evidently not, considering he would somehow be able to extract information from her.

But…

Maybe that wasn't so bad? What if the Uchiha person was capable of seeing her memories, or opening them up to her? Was it worth going along with their plan of capturing her?

Biting her lip, she reopened her eyes, watching the darkening sky with a frown. There was every chance she would dislike what was discovered – higher chance of them disliking it, also. That would mean another fight to escape and she'd already struggled immensely against two of them. Going against three would be out of the question. _What could she even do when she was so pitifully weakened?_ Could she even transform while missing limbs? While so spent on energy?

"Oi, Sasori-no-Danna." A hum of acknowledgement was all Deidara had to go on to continue. He did so quietly, muttering, "Do you think there's more like her?"

The question caused her heart to leap into her throat, because more than anything, she wanted to know she wasn't alone. She wanted reassurance that she wasn't some kind of freak of nature. That her huge ass self was completely fucking normal.

"Uchiha-san will find out once we reach Ame," he answered at length. She wondered if he was against theories that could potentially make him sound like an idiot. "There is no use in speculating or dabbling in what ifs."

"At least we know they're weak against explosions," Deidara said after a few moments of silence. "If there are more out there, yeah."

She was weak against explosions? Then again, considering how freaking powerful they were, surely everyone was weak against them? Or was that not the case in the strange world she'd woken up in? Were there possibly freakishly overpowered opponents out there that could crush her in an instant? Like the tailed beast Deidara had mentioned? How powerful were they and did she even stand a chance, should she cross paths with one?

There were too many questions. Way, way too many. And while she knew they were certainly overwhelming, she never would have imagined that it would be to the point of going on autopilot, acting almost like their puppet as they controlled where she was going entirely and at what pace. Eyes glued to the now-dark sky as they escaped the cover of the trees, she was awoken from her trance by the rain that splashed against her body, first slowly, then harder, faster, the further they walked from the forest.

"They're still going," muttered Deidara, alerting her to the fact that it wasn't the first time he'd mentioned it. "Have you ever met a human who regenerates?"

"Regenerates? No. Rebirths, in a sense? Yes."

"You mean Orochimaru?" he questioned curiously. "Doesn't he shed his skin like a snake?"

"I suppose that is one way of putting it."

"I always thought he was creepy, yeah."

"I am sure he would be wounded to hear that."

"Really?"

A sigh.

They seemed so… _normal_ that it disgusted her. How could two guys who'd brought down an entire village and chased her down for the hell of it, _literally blowing her limbs off to subdue her_ , sound so ordinary? Like they were just like anyone else? They weren't human – they were monsters through and through. Cold-hearted murderers. She needed them to keep acting like it.

"What do we do when we figure out what she is?"

Was Deidara always so talkative? She found herself staring up at the rain in exasperation, so damned tempted to tell him to shut the hell up already – well, if she could talk, she would.

What was up with that, considering she could say the odd word here and there? Had she merely forgotten how to speak due to being alone for so long? Was she a mute? Had whatever wiped her memories also taken away her ability to talk? If so, then why? What was the point in that other than to make her life ten times harder?

"We're here," Sasori informed his partner rather than answering his question, much to her annoyance.

She wanted to know what he had planned too and whether it had anything to do with her becoming an addition to his collection, like he'd boasted during their battle.

_What did that even mean?_

It didn't matter what it meant. All she knew was that her survival instincts were telling her to get the hell out of there while she still could. Something was off about the rain – she could tell now that she was all but drowning in the heavy downpour. It was laced in something – was it chakra? It certainly wasn't natural.

"Guess they know we're here, yeah."

Yes, it most definitely wasn't natural.

Stealing a glance down at her regenerating limbs, she took a deep breath and strained against the black sand restraints wrapped around her – a feat that proved to be useless after mere moments, for they were far too tight and immediately reddened against her sensitive, still-healing flesh.

Wincing, she stilled and returned to looking at the sky, only to flinch when she met curious blue eyes peering down on her. How hadn't she noticed her face being shielded from the rain? Or the sudden shadow materialising over her?

"You're awake, yeah."

No shit.

But she frustratingly couldn't talk, instead nodding meekly.

"Do you have a name?"

Why did he want to know? Did he get off on knowing his victims before brutally murdering them for merely _living?_

"You still can't talk, yeah." The smirk directed down at her would have been handsome, had it not been so sinister. "Don't worry. We know a guy who can get it out of you."

She really didn't like the sound of the Uchiha guy.

"Stop tormenting her."

Grateful when Deidara's attention was diverted, she breathed out a weighty sigh, eyes shutting again in a show of ignorance, despite the scenery having changed and part of her feeling intrigued about the tall buildings that loomed over them. It was a wondrous sight, without a doubt, but she had to remain firm and uncaring, didn't she?

"Why should I? She tried to eat me, yeah. This is the least she deserves."

She tuned them out.

He was a hothead, from what she'd seen of him so far, whereas the redhead was more composed and harder to rile up. That could potentially work to her advantage – the former, she meant. If worst came to worst, maybe she could rile Deidara up enough to kill her before the Uchiha got his hands on her.

But…

But she needed to know the truth and her heart screamed that he held the key to unlocking her memories, somehow. Whether he could be trusted or not wasn't–

What the hell was she thinking? Her captors couldn't be trusted and anybody who worked alongside them couldn't be trusted either. They were most likely just as evil, if not more so and she wanted nothing to do with any of them. Somehow, she would escape and find her own damn way to unlocking her memories, even if it took her a lifetime to do so. It was far better than consorting with murderers. For all she knew, they could all be heinous convicts with a number of unjustifiable crimes _each_.

What's worse: nobody seemed to question the pair of men who had a badly injured woman strapped to a carrier. The area was packed with people going about their day, the numerous conversations, and shouts to attract customers to stalls overwhelming her senses easily. Weakly, she opened her eyes and found that Deidara was still kneeling above her head, though his gaze was focused on the bustling streets surrounding them, like he was watching closely for an enemy of some kind.

Was it a good thing that she hadn't made it to the village in time? She wondered pitifully what she would have been like. Unable to talk, overwhelmed by busy streets, using only actions that had apparently been aggressive enough to warrant her two captors to attack. Would she have made any sense to them? Could they have attacked just like Deidara and Sasori?

Swallowing hard, she stared up at the blond hovering over her, focusing intently on his features to try and distract herself from the epic meltdown threatening to consume her.

He was a pretty man with long blond hair that had fallen over his shoulder, dangling between them and becoming soaked from the rain. Every so often, a droplet of rain would drip from his hair and splash on her cheek, although she barely felt it in that moment.

"What is it?" he demanded upon noticing her staring. "What are you looking at?"

She could only stare, jaw setting with the fierceness of her battle to remain strong.

Something flashed in his eyes too fast for her to pinpoint and he guessed, "You haven't been around this many people before, have you?"

In a quick, jerky motion, she shook her head.

"I don't get why they're all out," he muttered with a huff, going back to surveying the crowds that barely even parted to allow them through.

"They have no choice," responded Sasori blandly. "It is always raining here."

Meaning nothing would get done if they remained indoors and cursed the weather. Most, if not all, probably had jobs that required their attention or families that needed providing for. She–

Nope. She couldn't focus on them to distract herself. It was making her feel worse.

All she could do was continue to stare up at Deidara with a lip that was trying desperately to quiver, her emotions crashing into her unbearably and almost drowning her.

"Big change for you, right, Sasori-no-Danna?" he questioned casually, arm slung over his thigh, hand catching the droplets of rain that fell from his hair and sparing her cheek. "You grew up in the desert-"

"Enough, Deidara. You're irritating me."

 _No, keep talking and distracting me_ , she wanted to beg of her captors, all the while damning herself for such pitiful weakness. How the hell could she expect a single ounce of kindness from the man who'd blown her freaking arm and legs off? Sure, they were growing back _but that_ _was hardly the point!_

It wasn't soon enough when they were completely shielded from the rain and she shut her eyes with a sigh when the noises from the busy streets were shut out firmly. Not even Deidara suddenly jumping from her carrier brought her out of that sweet, sweet relief, for the sudden respite of pressure in her chest was just… _magnificent_ and she could feel the aftereffects of it rushing through her body.

"You're back," greeted a person she could not see. It didn't sound intimidating in the least, leading her to assume they were not–

" _That is not a jinchūriki."_

Her eyes snapped open, wide and fearful.

_There were two of them?_

What happened to their visiting Uchiha? Was one of the two voices she'd just heard him? Gods, she hoped not. At least, she hoped it wasn't the scary, gravelly voice that sent shivers of fear and disgust down her spine. The aura coming from the guy who'd spoken last was downright disgusting, though admittedly she only noticed that _after_ hearing him speak. She'd stupidly assumed there was only one person in the room with them.

"Blame Sasori-no-Danna," muttered Deidara with a sigh. "He's-"

"Enough, Deidara," Sasori warned, not for the first time.

Grimacing, she fought against her restraints, but even after recuperating for as long as she had, she was no match for them. If anything, the more she struggled, the more unusually tired she became – kind of like they were literally draining the life from her. Was such a feat possible?

" _Is Leader-sama aware of your slacking?"_

Leader? _Leader?_ Holy shit, how many of them were there and did she even stand a chance of escape at that point? So far, she counted five potential enemies – six, if that Uchiha guy wasn't one of the most recent three.

"Are you going to tell on us, Zetsu?" Deidara asked bitingly.

One of them _had_ to be Uchiha. There couldn't be more. She swallowed her nerves and clenched her fist.

They were wise enough to make it difficult for her to bite her hand – she'd foolishly allowed them to witness how she transformed and while she was doubting the blond's intelligence, Sasori seemed fairly clued-up. Out of the two of them, he was indisputably the brains in their partnership, she concluded.

What could she do?

Nothing, she realised, the dread feeling like a lump of lead in her stomach.

There was nothing she could do.

Already, she was defying the odds by going against Sasori and Deidara – they'd defeated her once before, after all and now they knew her abilities. She wasn't sure if there were ways to intercept the transformation or make it stop, but she had an inkling that if there was, the redhead would know how to. She simply couldn't… It was as though his lifeless brown eyes bore straight into her soul, seeing nothing but knowing everything.

The Zetsu guy – whichever of the two voices he was – was a risk in battling, for there was every chance he could be twice as strong as the other two. Or maybe even the type to linger in the background and strike when the person's attention was diverted. The same went for the second voice.

Then, there was the Uchiha guy. From earlier information, she knew he was staying somewhere in the building. The likelihood of their leader hanging around was too high also.

She was outnumbered and outclassed.

_She was trapped._

"We're looking for Uchiha-san. Is he here?" enquired Sasori before an argument could ensue – if one would.

"Yes," the higher pitched voice – the first one – replied simply. "He is in his room."

"Kisame?" came Deidara's flippant question.

Kisame?

_Another one?_

No, she was done. She was so fucking screwed. Forget escape. Merely _imagining_ escaping was futile.

"Attending others matters."

" _What do you need Uchiha Itachi for?"_

She found herself moving before either man had answered the second, terrifying voice's question and as she slowly passed them – _it_ – she quickly discovered they had no intentions of sharing their plans as they outright ignored him.

What the hell was that plant looking thing? Yes, she knew she could hardly throw around judgement considering she turned into a monster at the bite of her hand, but that was… The whole situation was insane. _What was it?_ It was two people – the two voices _belonged_ to that one being living _inside a plant_ and from the perfect line down the centre of their body, she guessed that they were two people shoved into one. Gods, she… She couldn't process any of it. She'd officially entered the land of insanity.

The never-ending halls were bleak and damp with no decorations (though she was simply glad that there was no more rain lashing down on her), and try as she might to keep up with all the twists and turns they made, it was impossible to keep track of everything. By the seventh set of stairs, she'd forgotten the first two turns. She decided that she would have more luck in bulldozing her way through a wall and hoping for the best, than trying to navigate her way out of the building.

She was at risk of being breathless or lightheaded when they finally came to a stop – and she wasn't even the one climbing all the stairs – in a narrow hallway that consisted of four doors. Like everywhere else up until that point, it was grim and boring and somewhere, there was a maddening leak that she could _hear but not see._ What made it worse was that her two captors didn't even seem to notice it, instead knocking on the door without hesitation.

They waited all of four seconds before the door was opening with a cringe-worthy creak.

Painfully tilting her head to get a look at the guy, her brows furrowed. He certainly didn't look all that intimidating – if anything, he looked–

"Sasori-san. Deidara-san."

Nope. Scratch that. Although he didn't look menacing, his aura and flat voice set her on edge immediately. That and the fact that he didn't even _glance_ in her direction, like bloodied captives strapped down was a sight he saw often.

" _You'll be a fine addition."_

She shuddered, the depressing thought that it undoubtedly _was_ a sight he saw often shutting out all other thoughts, refusing to let her imagine any other outcome.

"We require your assistance-"

" _You_ require it," interrupted Deidara with a huff of annoyance.

Sasori looked in his partner's direction, though she was confused by the lack of emotion behind the stare. Was he annoyed? Amused? Upset? She doubted they would ever know, for the redhead didn't have the chance to respond verbally. He was interrupted by the Uchiha.

"I have no reason to assist you in your interrogation," he answered blandly. "This woman is not one of the Akatsuki's targets, rendering her useless to our goal and to me. If you will excuse me–"

Before he had the chance to shut his door, Sasori intervened by stepping forward and she was no longer able to see his blank face, for his back was to her. Believing him to be a waste of time, she looked to Deidara, the annoyance in his expression confusing her further.

"Need I remind you of the debt you owe me?"

Debt? She narrowed her eyes. Was it normal for comrades to owe one another or hold debts against each other? And what kind of debt was it? It had to have been something unsavoury, for the other man's features smoothed out after the briefest of narrowing of his eyes.

She got the feeling that, although they worked together, they did not trust one another. Did they even like each other? It seemed impossible, given the intense stare down that ensued following Sasori's statement.

They were not invited in. Uchiha didn't even verbally agree to the demand.

Sighing, he acknowledged her presence for the first time by meeting her eyes, causing her to flinch at the blood red orbs staring down at her coldly, sucking her mind away from her without permission. She could have sworn his eyes were black only a moment ago.

"Her name is Shizuku," he murmured almost instantaneously.


	4. Chapter 4

Where in the seven hells was she? And why did it look so nauseatingly bewildering?

" _Shizuku."_

The name rang an intense bell of familiarity, leaving her in a state of confused awe. It was undoubtedly her name – it was way too familiar to her and instincts had her turning the moment she heard it. It simply felt… _right._

The red sky was blurred by fast moving clouds, and if she focused on them for too long, she grew dizzy from their incessant pace. Looking around didn't help matters either, because despite feeling no wind, the trees surrounding them were just as rapid as the clouds in their movements.

It was while trying to avoid staring at one particular spot that she spotted him.

Uchiha stood opposite her several metres away, his eyes once more black and confirming her earlier suspicions about their changing colour. Somehow, he appeared more menacing in the strange world where colours were inverted and timing was warped, leaving Shizuku to take an uncertain step back. The moment she did, his eyes bled red once more, looking ominous against his silhouette.

"You're susceptible to genjutsu – more so than anyone I have ever met."

His eyes were to blame, survival instincts informed her, and she narrowed hers in response, wondering how she would escape his world.

"You cannot leave," Uchiha said like he could read her mind, freaking her out further. "I am in complete control here."

Although he made no move towards her, Shizuku found herself growing increasingly panicked, because for the life of her, she couldn't think of a sound way out. Did she target his eyes? Kill him off altogether? Or would either of those plans leave her trapped there for the rest of her life? Was it entirely in her head or were they somehow transported to another realm?

Again, reading her mind, he said with a minute tone of surprise, "You truly have no knowledge of genjutsu."

Obviously not, she wanted to snap.

Looking around only made her feel sicker and more frightened, so Shizuku settled on holding his red-eyed gaze, valiantly fighting back the shudders within her that they evoked.

"I will hold you here for as long as it takes to extract the information Sasori-san requires," he said, unconcerned for her lack of knowledge. Of course, she didn't really expect him to share his secrets with her. "However, this should be over relatively quickly, which is fortunate, for your sake."

Yeah, because _that_ didn't sound ominous in the slightest. Breathing quickening as she imagined all the terrible ways it could go wrong, or that she could be traumatised, Shizuku made the mistake in taking her eyes off the strange man, stomach lurching in response to the fast paced world whizzing by around her. It felt like she could feel the entire planet spinning and she was merely stood there, left alone to watch the blurring scenes.

"These are your memories surrounding us," Uchiha supplied.

Try as she might, she couldn't focus on any of them and having them so vexingly close but still out of reach had her hands twitching, attempting to raise to her mouth out of anger.

By the tiniest amount, Uchiha raised one eyebrow.

And then her back was slamming against a wooden post, her arms spread wide as they were restrained. She struggled against the restraints, growling and spitting and screeching incoherently until he stepped forward and forced Shizuku to meet his eye. He was by no means gentle when gripping her chin, locking her jaw when she tried biting him, and she felt like the air around them pulsated as their eyes locked once more, the power of his genjutsu strengthening.

"That won't work here, but the restraints will make this easier."

Oh? He'd seen her transformation already?

"Of course," he replied to her thoughts without pause. "It is your clearest memory."

Shizuku willed herself to calm down and face the situation rationally. At that moment in time, Uchiha was her best bet at discovering the secrets of her supposedly blanked mind, even if it was through unethical methods or at the wishes of a sociopath. He could aid her in finding out who and what she was, and why Sasori and Deidara were so surprised by her transformation since it apparently wasn't a norm to them.

"It isn't," he explained with a sigh and she noticed the faint furrowing of his brows. "It is nothing like the Akimichi clan's expansion jutsu, and I have yet to cross paths with anyone else capable of such a jutsu. Moreover, despite their ferocious appetites, the Akimichi clan are not cannibals."

 _Then what am I?_ She directed the thought at him with every ounce of strength she had, even if it wasn't necessary.

"A Titan."

Titan…

It felt more familiar than her actual name.

"A species resented and feared," he murmured thoughtfully, then languidly focused on her eyes once more, his own narrowing fractionally. "For good reason."

What did that mean?

Wincing as the grip on her jaw tightened roughly, she stared up at Uchiha unsurely. Everything was restrained, leaving her completely at his mercy.

What was he going to do to her? Would she be freed from the unusual world now that he had his answers? No, Shizuku concluded at the resolution in his ominous stare. He'd undoubtedly decided on her fate and it wasn't pleasant – she could see it as clear as day.

"You were sent her for uncertain reasons, though it was unquestionably to cause chaos in our world."

He was going to kill her.

"The hows and whys don't matter, in this case."

 _No,_ she mentally begged.

She meant no harm. Truly, she didn't. Everything that'd happened in the past however many hours was solely down to her need to survive and find her answers. The battle with Sasori and Deidara even proved she wasn't much of a threat! They'd taken her out so easily that it was almost embarrassing. Surely that told Uchiha all he needed to know to ensure the safety of his world?

"Sasori-san and Deidara-san are talented shinobi. Not all can say the same."

"Pl-Plea-"

"Forgive me," Uchiha murmured, bringing tears to her eyes when he shut his in resignation. "I have given up too much to allow such a threat to roam free."

"Please," she managed to whisper.

_I won't hurt anyone._

"But the risk is still there," he contended firmly.

Eyes reopening, he regarded her with the same impassive expression he'd adorned during the short conversation with Sasori, and in that moment, Shizuku knew her fate was sealed. Heart turning to a lump of searing lead that caused an immense pain to explode in her chest, all she could do was stare helplessly at him.

In his world of genjutsu, she was helpless.

Furthermore, she was restrained securely with no way of escape.

With her death surely imminent, Shizuku questioned whether the basic information Uchiha shared with her was enough. Her name, being a Titan, being sent to create chaos. Was it enough for her?

No.

"Please," she tried once more, the oddness of finally using her voice following her into his world.

Wasn't there any kind of mortality within Uchiha? Within any of the men in the matching cloaks? Or did they possess a switch to turn their humanity off, to grant them with the ability to carry out such callous tasks? Did they care at all that they were about to take another's life?

"You speak of it as though morality is black and white," Uchiha murmured with what could almost be described as a huff of amusement, but the expression in his eyes conveyed his unshakeable emotions clearly. "It never is."

Shutting her eyes in resignation, Shizuku allowed her body to sag against the restraints and it stunned her to notice that the pain registered like they were out in the real world.

"You have made quite the impression," noted Uchiha, but she couldn't hear his words. Not completely.

How was she supposed to be able to focus on him when there was an inescapable pressure on her throat that appeared out of nowhere? Uchiha wasn't touching her. Hadn't moved a muscle. But the pain was there – it definitely was and Shizuku knew she wasn't imagining it because _she couldn't breathe._

He was killing her, wasn't he?

What was happening on the outside? Was that where he was attacking? Were Sasori and Deidara merely watching, or was the impossible actually happening and were they defending her?

Wryly, she smiled despite the inability to breathe.

Her only hope was that Sasori's need to make her an addition (as sickening as that need may be) pulled through in her favour, forcing him into saving her life. There was no expecting Deidara would protect her – why would he? She tried to eat him and in return, he'd relished in severing several of her limbs and throwing countless explosions her way.

But that wouldn't happen, would it?

She was dying.

* * *

"Wh…"

What happened?

Where was she?

The room she awoke in was different from the genjutsu world, and she sighed in relief at the normal pace everything was moving at.

Gripping at the soft covers beneath her, Shizuku gritted her teeth and put all her strength into turning onto her side, only to yelp in surprise when the world shifted without warning. The sound of her skin slapping to the cement ground registered before the stinging sensation, although it was all quickly drowned out by the mocking laughter that echoed around the room.

To say that she was dying… whenever the hell it'd happened… Shizuku could hardly believe that she didn't feel any adverse effects. Whatever he'd been doing to her had seemed so absolute, like there was no getting out of it. He wanted her dead, so it was going to happen.

So why was she awake and feeling okay?

"You got lucky," came a familiar voice that she shouldn't have felt relieved to hear but did anyway. "It's not every day Sasori no Danna gets serious, yeah."

Sasori…?

"S-Sa…fe?"

Canting her head back, she saw intrigue filling Deidara's single blue eye as he crouched beside her collapsed form, arms resting on his bent knees. "You can speak now?"

Not without great effort, but she was beginning to get it. Apparently watching others converse helped. Shizuku made a mental note to always take great interest whenever another was speaking, seeing as it meant bettering her own communication skills.

"Yeah, you're safe," Deidara told her with a huff. His expression told her he was unimpressed with his comrade's actions. "For now, anyway."

She shook her head, telling him while struggling to voice her thoughts that it wasn't herself that she was concerned about.

"Sasori no Danna?"

Heaving herself up against what she presumed to be a bed, she ignored the coolness of the metal that sent a chill down her spine and caused her to jolt instinctively, keeping her eyes locked on Deidara's.

If Sasori saved her life, then she was indebted to him and would thank him appropriately. After all, until that point he'd been nothing to her other than a captor with an unsettling fascination in her transformation – probably the reasoning behind his saving her, but regardless, he'd done it and for that, she was grateful.

Eye shutting in a show of reluctant endurance, the blond nodded. "He's good, yeah. Just repairing a few of his weapons."

Did that mean Uchiha was dead? A dark inkling had Shizuku believing that only one would walk away from a battle in the foreign world she'd found herself in, and if that victor was Sasori, then that meant Uchiha was dead. And despite it being absolutely ridiculous for feeling such an emotion after what he'd done, she couldn't help but feel guilty over his death, since it was evident from the apologetic flash in Uchiha's eyes that he'd been reluctant in killing her.

Honestly? Had their roles been reversed, perhaps she would have done the same thing. If a strange creature was sent with evil intentions and was destined to wreak havoc on her world, threatening her loved ones, then Shizuku knew she would act swiftly and repent afterwards. Wouldn't anyone?

Swallowing hard to soothe her achingly dry throat, she assessed Deidara's body for wounds or other signs of battle, but there were none – not that it really surprised her. From their short spat, Shizuku had quickly come to realise that he fought from a distance (if he'd even fought for her at all). It was a good thing really, for it potentially spared him from the genjutsu world Uchiha ensnared her within.

"Shizuku, huh?"

Blinking the deep thoughts from her mind, she once more met Deidara's eye with a frown, slowly nodding.

"Uchiha didn't say much about what you are before trying to kill you," he said after a few moments. As she had him, he analysed her body, gaze lingering on her throat. "But whatever you are, you heal fast, yeah."

Raising a curious hand to her throat, she tried to feel for evidence of what'd happened, but there was nothing there. Like Deidara said: she healed fast.

"Titan."

"Titan?" came his sceptical response. "What does that mean?"

She shrugged, because honestly? She didn't know either. All she did know was that it fit in her mind, like a piece of the puzzle was sliding nicely into place. It even brought forth a surge of comfort.

When she continued to probe the area, Deidara sighed with annoyance and grabbed her hand, lowering it several inches, allowing her to feel the almost fully healed wound. They both pretended she didn't flinch at the sudden contact. "He slit your throat – well, I thought he did considering just how much blood there was, but obviously not."

No, she believed he _had_. Someone like him surely had good aim, although there was no telling what those weird eyes of his did. Perhaps by dropping her into that other world, he'd lost his vision due to also being there with her? But that made little sense, because surely that meant he wouldn't be able to attack her so swiftly, seeing as both Sasori and Deidara had been between them.

More importantly: how durable did her being a Titan make her?

Another sigh brought Shizuku out of her musings, and she looked up to Deidara once more, hand lingering on her neck. "Dead?"

"Who? Uchiha?" the blond said derisively with a snort. "I wish."

He was still alive? What did that mean for her? What did it mean for Sasori? Weren't they supposed to be comrades? If so, then would he be kicked out of his group for turning on a fellow member? Would he be forced to hand her over? What if Uchiha struck again?

"Others got involved," Deidara filled in the gaps for her, fortunately without her spending an eternity attempting to ask him to. "They broke it up before someone got themselves killed."

Falling back out of his crouch opposite her, he kept his arms slung over his raised knees, watching her just as intently as she watched him. The trust was non-existent between them, and it showed in the way their muscles remained tense and prepared, although Shizuku was unsure what exactly she planned to do if Deidara actually attacked. She was weak against his fighting style, both due to the explosions and his ability to fight from a distance.

"Look, I don't like you. And I don't know why Sasori no Danna has to have you when he could just kill a stray Akimichi. At least that way he wouldn't have to do much research into the technique." Rolling his eyes, he said simply, "Having a cannibal on the team is hardly comforting, yeah."

That wasn't her, though. It couldn't be. Cannibalism – just the thought of it – turned her stomach.

But what if it _was_ her? Or, at least, her other self? Were they even the same person? Sometimes it felt like they were, but other times, it was like she wasn't in control. She merely got to watch through the eyes of her huge ass self. And it was like Sasori said! Even her appearance was different. So surely that meant it wasn't actually her? Right?

"But the fact is that he _does_ want you," Deidara muttered reluctantly. Looking away from her, he glared at a window she hadn't originally realised was there due to being distracted by him, his eye narrowing fractionally. At what, Shizuku couldn't tell. All she could see was a torrential downpour that didn't appear to be easing up anytime soon. "And even if we don't agree on each other's interpretations of art, I'm not about to get in the way of his, yeah."

Not bothering to hide her frown of confusion at his words, she watched him closely, wondering what the hell he was even talking about.

Better yet, why did it send a shudder of revulsion down her spine?


	5. Chapter 5

When Sasori eventually returned, Shizuku couldn't figure out how he was feeling towards her or their troublesome situation. He didn't look annoyed about fighting for her, or upset for almost having to kill a comrade, didn't look happy at her survival. His mask was flawless, almost _too_ smooth, and it once more reminded her of Deidara's sarcastic retort.

" _You're not even a living person."_

It certainly explained why he was seemingly so unshakeable, not to mention the inhuman strength and speed. No ordinary human was able to use such a power – or could they? Was she abnormal back in her own world like she was there? Were the humans as strong as the men before her, or were they considerably weaker? Could they use chakra?

So far, she had six facts to go off.

Her name was Shizuku.

She was a Titan.

She was sent from a different world for unknown, though certainly sinister, reasons.

One of her captors wasn't a living person and wanted to make her an addition to whatever kind of collection he had (also certainly sinister).

She was also now indebted to said captor due to him saving her life from Uchiha. How she would repay that debt, Shizuku wasn't sure, but she most definitely wasn't going to do it by offering herself up to him for his collection.

The final fact she had to go off was Deidara not making a move against her anytime soon. To do so meant he would be getting in the way of Sasori's art – whatever the hell _that_ meant.

Everything else were guesses that she couldn't rely on in the slightest, because the world she'd found herself in was just so… Well, Shizuku supposed she had nothing to really compare it to, but it felt so unnatural to her, like even without her memory, it was nothing like what she was used to. Instincts screamed at her that she was way outclassed by them all and needed to find some way of securing her survival – thankfully, that was where one of her facts came into play.

Sasori wanted her and due to it being for his art collection, Deidara was willing to protect her too (albeit, for his partner's sake and not hers, which hardly made him loyal to her).

Could she play on their shared love of art? Was there any way to use it to her advantage?

Deidara said that Sasori wanted to research her huge ass self for a while longer – no doubt that was so he could find out how to use the form without putting himself at risk during battle. There was potential there to draw out whatever he had planned for her, Shizuku noted, leaning back against the wall her futon was pushed up against, watching curiously as the redhead set to assessing the damage of his–

What in the holy _hell_ was _that?_

Definitely not a living person, Shizuku reminded herself with a delicate shudder. The sight of the weapon hidden beneath what she'd assumed to be skin was horrific to say the least, but to then witness it dripping a purple liquid sent her mind back to when Sasori had tried to capture her. Although in the heat of the moment and desperate to save herself, she could still recall his surprise to find she was somehow immune to his poison. That had to be what the purple liquid was, and Shizuku assumed each weapon hidden beneath his strange body was also laced with the stuff.

How would he even research her other form? Uchiha made it clear that they didn't have Titans in their world, making her one of a kind and a complete mystery to them all. Even _she_ didn't know what she was or what she was capable of. That meant she would need some kind of emergency button to press should Sasori lose his patience and decide to end her life, since she was essentially a dead end. But what? What could she possibly use to make him reconsider?

"Oi."

Shizuku flinched as a container was thrust before her, followed by an odd paper package that landed onto the strange lid with a surprising clunk. She'd expected it to be weightless, meaning soundless too.

"Eat."

Eat? From… that?

A sigh of irritation had the blond who'd presented her with the alleged food crouch beside her futon, hands quick to tear the lid off the container, but just as he moved to toss it aside, she frowned and reached out, gesturing to his hand with an uncertain point.

"What?" he asked gruffly, clearly still annoyed about her existence. "Not raw enough for you?"

She ignored the jab, pointing more insistently at the strange marking she'd spotted for a fraction of a second on his palm.

Deidara paused at that and she noticed Sasori sparing them a glance over his shoulder before resuming work on his arm, making bile rise in Shizuku's throat with how effortlessly he removed his own goddamn arm.

What were they?

"What? _This?_ "

He turned his palm upwards and she was certain the bile was actually about to turn into full blown projectile vomiting when a tongue swiped across the rest of his palm, the small mouth grinning up at her.

_What the hell were they?!_

The scent of the food he'd brought to her was unappetising, turning her stomach almost as harshly as the strange men before her.

"Why are you looking at me like that when you turn into a repugnant monster that tries eating people?" he asked her snappishly, looking down his nose at Shizuku. "At least my hands have a use – you're useless in both forms."

Well, she'd definitely hit a nerve. Trying to steer the conversation away from her disgust, she pointed over at Sasori with a frown, hoping Deidara understood what she was trying to ask.

In a way, he did. But not entirely. "No. He can't use my jutsu."

Rolling her eyes felt like a completely natural instinct, one Shizuku didn't fight against much to the surprise of Deidara, who blinked owlishly for a second. While he tried to digest her brief comfortability with somewhat answering back, she copied Sasori's move of detaching his freaking arm, sending him another inquisitive look afterwards.

"H… How?"

Damn it, she really had to work more on her speech.

There was a snort from the other side of the room, and Shizuku looked to the redhead and watched with a turning stomach how he ran his fingers down the detached arm, admiring the handiwork. She noted that there were no marks indicating any pressure, meaning he either didn't apply any, or the surface that was supposed to be skin, was in fact hard.

"Sasori no Danna believes art is something that lasts forever," Deidara explained with a similar snort, rolling his own eyes. Without looking back to her, he tore open the strange paper package he threw down at her, revealing a stick of some sort. Was she supposed to use it? "So, _naturally_ ," he said the word with a smirk, like it was greatly amusing to him, "he immortalised himself."

"My body is my grandest work of art thus far," Sasori added blandly. She'd expected him to sound proud, but he sounded more bored than anything.

Wait, immortalised himself?

"How?" she repeated unsurely.

That uncertainty only grew by the moment as Deidara shoved the stick into her hand, leaving her to stare down at it unsurely. What the hell was she supposed to do with it? Stab at whatever the hell was in that container? The strings soaking within some kind of broth looked impossible to eat with a stick.

"It's instant ramen," he groaned with annoyance and once more, Shizuku flinched when he grabbed at her hands, forcing her to break apart the stick and she stared down dumbly as it separated evenly. "We're civilised here, yeah. We don't use our hands to eat. We use chopsticks."

Chopsticks? The word sounded distantly familiar, but–

* * *

" _No, Shizuku," the woman laughed kindly, her dark eyes creasing with mirth. "You're holding them all wrong!"_

* * *

What was that? Who was that woman? And why did the short memory fill her with such a heavy weight in her heart?

Shizuku glanced down at the chopsticks once more with a frown, accepting Deidara's hands as they manipulated hers into grabbing the wooden utensil. Like the word, it all felt so distantly familiar, but coupled with the unexplainable memory it felt raw, in a sense. Enough so that her throat ached.

How was she possibly supposed to eat with that strange memory and those two inhuman men in her presence?

The room wasn't big enough for the three of them (hell, she didn't think there was enough space for two of them, yet the two futons said differently), and Shizuku found herself rapidly growing more claustrophobic the longer she felt their eyes on her like they were physically causing the walls to close in around them, all the while waiting for her to take a bite of their instant ramen, pretending they weren't even doing anything.

_And that damned leak that was somewhere in the room with her, yet unseen!_

No, she couldn't do it. She couldn't. She had to get out of there and go back to her forest before–

 _No,_ Shizuku warned herself at their expectant expressions, hand trembling as she tried to piece together the puzzle required for her to be able to eat with chopsticks, if she'd even been able to do it in the first place.

"Do you actually need to eat people?" asked Deidara with a hint of apprehension to his tone before glancing to his partner with a deepening frown. "Oi, Sasori no Danna, I'm a lot of things but even I draw the line at cannibalism, yeah–"

She struggled valiantly to block out Deidara's words and instead focused intently on lifting the container as she did the chopsticks, having noticed several of the strange strings slipping from her grasp.

And then she managed to take a hearty mouthful, the broth splashing across her face when she was forced to slurp to ensure none of the food was dropped.

Deidara looked vaguely impressed, she noted. Sasori didn't.

"Haven't you ever eaten ramen before?" questioned the blond.

Not to her knowledge, no. Honestly, Shizuku wasn't sure what she'd eaten before losing her memories, but since then, it was whatever poor animal she could get her hands on and there were obviously never any utensils. She'd torn into them all with her teeth and hands.

"N-No," she managed to reply.

It was only then that she noticed Deidara also had a meal like hers, and she frowned thoughtfully as he blew across the top, disturbing the steam that surged for release the moment he removed the lid. Her curiosity was officially piqued when he stirred the contents, dipping them several times in the broth she'd been worried about spilling, so had tried to gently shake as much off.

"The noodles taste better when they're soaked, yeah," he told her after realising she was staring.

Noodles? So… they weren't strings? Somehow, it fit better, Shizuku decided after several moments and nodded in understanding to what the blond was saying, soon copying his example.

"And when you're done with the noodles," Deidara instructed once they were finished with them, "you drink the broth."

He did so loudly, much to her surprise and she looked to Sasori questioningly, only to find he was once more fixated on his arm, so quickly averted her gaze once more.

"So?"

Shizuku met Deidara's expectant stare, trying not to pay any attention to the traces of disdain and condescension because behind it was genuine curiosity. It made her wonder whether the whole tough act was just that – an act. Or maybe he was actually feeling sad, she wondered? They'd fought their comrade, after all and even _if_ he said Uchiha's name with hatred and disgust, he was still a comrade. Maybe he was sad and was trying to make himself feel better?

Swallowing to try and prepare herself for attempting to talk, she nodded slowly, mouth opening before promptly slamming shut. How did she move her mouth for the words 'it's good'?

Blue eyes rolled and he once more looked over to Sasori, muttering, "Looks like you've got your work cut out for you."

"You appear to be getting on well enough – you can teach her."

" _Huh?"_ came his indignant yell and Shizuku ducked her head as he whirled on his partner, glowering ferociously. She hoped he didn't start blowing the place up with his quite obvious anger issues. "I told you I didn't want anything to do with her, yeah! Are you forgetting she _tried_ to _eat me_?"

"Tried being the keyword," was all he said in return.

"Sasori no Danna, c'mon," he tried.

"I am going to be busy researching her kind."

"I'm busy too, yeah!"

"With?"

"With…"

"Precisely." She looked up in time to see him twisting his arm beneath a lamp, expression blank as he assessed damage she couldn't see. "As you can see, I'm busy and it's not like we will be capturing any jinchūriki as of this moment. What else is there for you to do?"

"Anything except humanising some giant ass cannibal!"

* * *

_The way she flitted around the small kitchen would remain the most fascinating sight to Shizuku. She was a physically powerful woman – one capable of causing such devastation for whoever dared to oppose her – with such a cool façade that it continuously threw their enemies off. However, in their home, she was a completely different person and the switch in personalities never failed to leave her in a state of awe._

_Her impeccable skills on the battlefield revealed themselves in her actions, and Shizuku leaned forward at the table, head in both hands, as she watched her with a smile. Balancing several plates at once, never missing a beat in preparing the meals, tackling washing dishes and pans as she went, Shizuku couldn't help but believe that her mother was a wonder. The kitchen was something she'd conquered with what appeared like great ease, refusing to be taken down by wrong timings or temperature settings or even mess._

" _Shizuku," her mother called, scrubbing away at a pan while simultaneously stirring the contents in another. "Call your father and let him know dinner is almost ready."_

_They were perfect – her mother and father, she meant. Not because they were remarkable scouts who were admired and feared by many, but because they were her parents. They were nothing like their warrior personas. They went all out as they usually did of course, but in a more familial way. Always tucking her in, always ensuring she was happy and comfortable, kissing her forehead and holding her when she was ill or in need of comfort. Those kinds of things. She saw a side to them nobody else was allowed to._

_Shizuku grinned when her mother glanced over her shoulder, nodding her understanding. "Yes, Mama!"_

* * *

The chopstick woman was her mother?

Shizuku rubbed a hand up her clammy face, grimacing at the tight sensation in her chest. Apparently, without her realising it until much later on, Uchiha had done a number on her head and the door that had once kept her memories shut away from her, was cracked open, allowing Shizuku to remember her old life in bits and pieces.

"M-Ma…" The noise felt foreign on her tongue and she swallowed, eyes straining to try and see through the darkness that told her it was still late at night. "M-M-M…"

"You should rest."

Struggling against the weight in her chest, Shizuku leaned up on an elbow and glanced to the figure who suddenly turned on his desk lamp, illuminating his dead brown eyes as well as a small section of the room, showing her Deidara asleep on the other futon. The way the light bounced off his eyes had her inwardly shuddering, because for some odd reason she just couldn't shake, an image of a porcelain doll with glass eyes continuously flooded her mind.

It was surreal to believe Sasori was what he believed to be his ultimate piece of art, and Shizuku questioned what said art was, hoping he would somehow figure out where her thoughts were and answer them for her. He didn't, of course.

Glancing down at the blanket covering her waist, Shizuku lay back and brought it further up her body, attempting to recall the sensation her younger self from the memory experienced when tucked in at night. But there was nothing. Just a deep ache she couldn't understand.

"What is it?" Sasori enquired despite having ordered her to rest. Surprising Shizuku further, he left his desk and approached her silently, sitting beside her futon at a respectful distance. "Your eyes say you remember something."

They did? Did that mean he could use the same technique Uchiha had? Or was he simply observant?

Could she say what was on her mind?

"M-M-M-Ma…"

Sasori's head dipped ever so slightly, those strange eyes that were intense for all the wrong reasons locking with hers as he tried to understand.

"M-Ma…"

"Ma?" Would he have frowned, once upon a time, she wondered? "Mama?"

Yes.

Yes!

Nodding enthusiastically and sitting up once more, she smiled widely as he slowly repeated it, copying the way his mouth and tongue had moved when he carefully enunciated the word for her.

"M-Mama," she managed to say after several attempts. "Mama!"

"You had a dream of your mother?" She nodded again, though this time without the smile because despite her achievement, the pain returned and weighed her down. "A bad dream." It wasn't a question, but she nodded anyway, then shrugged because was it really a bad dream if she'd been happy in it? "You're not sure."

How could she explain the mess in her heart and mind when she couldn't even begin to understand any of it?

"It was a happy dream, but you're sad."

That. That was exactly it. Again, Shizuku nodded, then flinched at the odd wetness that splashed on her hand, forcing her to glance down at the tight fists that'd scrunched up the blanket.

Once again, she raised it to her chin, only to sob quietly as the weight transformed into full blown torment at the coldness she felt.

Something about her grief appeared to have an affect on Sasori, Shizuku vaguely noticed, because he silently leaned forward and guided her back, his eyes shutting like he couldn't bear to look at her. And as much as she wanted to question what the hell he was doing to her, she couldn't, because even if she _could_ talk, Sasori re-stole the ability by taking the blanket from her grip and tucking her in without a word, the empathy in his next words unmissable even with his quiet, bland voice.

"Goodnight, Shizuku."

* * *

Sasori was persuasive. And while Shizuku was well aware of Deidara's particularly vocal reluctance, she was still surprised when she awoke to find him actually prepared for a day of training, without Sasori pushing any further.

Said redhead didn't utter a word to her about the night before and she had no idea how to thank him for his shocking comfort. So, instead, Shizuku also prepared herself for the training, deciding that the best way to thank him was to do as he asked. After all, not only had he saved her life from Uchiha, but he'd also comforted her. She had to repay him somehow for such kindness, didn't she?

She wondered what the training would involve. Was it physical training? Purely _humanising_ training?

As much as Shizuku wanted to reclaim who she'd once been, to simply _remember_ who she'd once been, she wasn't entirely sure it would do her any good. The memory from the night before and her reaction to it was still painstakingly fresh in her mind. Would the rest be that way? Would she eventually remember what happened to her parents – _if_ anything happened to them? There had to have been some kind of reason she was sent to a different universe.

"C'mon," Deidara muttered as he donned his cloak, barely even sparing her a glance. "First thing's first: we're getting you fresh clothes."

"Eh?" The noise came her from effortlessly, though he didn't seem to care all that much. She was forced to rush after him when he left, struggling into her boots along the way.

"There's no telling how long you've been festering in those clothes, yeah. We can't exactly humanise you if you look and smell like an animal, can we?" he demanded with great annoyance, flashing a glare her way from over his shoulder.

She frowned deeply at the harsh words, easily understanding what was happening as her pride was bruised. It wasn't like she hadn't bathed at all – she had. It was partly the reason why she stuck close to rivers or at least followed the sound of water. Had her washing not been good enough, for some reason?

"I'm tired of you stinking out my room, yeah. So we're getting you new clothes."

New…

She fingered the hem of her cloak, eyes drawn to the old fabric. Once upon a time, it would have been vibrant in its green shade, though now it was dull and covered in dirt, with frayed edges and small tears here and there. No matter how bad it looked, however, the thought of throwing it out hurt similarly to the pain the night before, making her wonder if it'd belonged to one of her parents.

If Deidara tried to force her to throw it away, she would protect it fiercely. If it came down to it, then maybe that time she would actually eat him just to teach him a lesson.

The place he took her to wasn't far from where they were staying, though she grumbled to herself the entire way there as she was still forced to leave the building and brave the cold rain. Even with her cloak's hood pulled all the way down it still bit into her skin like shards of glass, the constant wind making it all the more painful.

Lines of clothing covered the walls, accompanied by small sections throughout the floor boasting tall stands of shoes. Nothing in particular stood out as they entered, for it was all dark clothing for the most part, with random shades of blue or light grey thrown in from time to time. It was nothing like her once white pants and shirt, or tan jacket and green cloak. The dark brown knee high boots she wore were the closest thing to anything the store had to offer, and even then, it wasn't exactly the same.

"Grab whatever you want," muttered Deidara, barely even sparing the shocked woman behind a counter a nod. "Our leader has a deal with this place."

Did she even want to find out what that meant? Shizuku frowned, glancing to the woman. She looked scared and had from the moment she spotted Deidara's cloak, telling her without words that it wasn't a good deal on her part. Not entirely, anyway.

"Get enough for a few days at least."

She could barely nod while perusing the shelves, guilt blooming in her chest whenever she caught sight of the scared woman. What was she supposed to do, though? Refuse and risk having her limbs blown off again? They'd shown her small bursts of kindness, but there was no forgetting the pain they'd put her through either, especially not when faced with another who was suffering because of them.

What made it worse was that the unwaveringly calm Sasori wasn't around to tame Deidara like he seemingly had before, or to save her if she pissed someone in their inhumanly strong world off (she doubted Deidara had any part to play in saving her from Uchiha, after all). What if she happened across someone who could blow her up like Deidara had?

"Don't just pick anything up, idiot," Deidara snapped suddenly when she grabbed the first pair of pants styled somewhat like her own, making her jump. "Check the size first. I'm not coming back to exchange any of it, yeah."

"C-Can I help?" asked the petite woman behind the counter, and Shizuku inwardly cringed at the thought of having to face her fear directly, rather than through occasional glances in her direction. "I can… I can get you the right sizes?"

"Hurry up and do it then," ordered Deidara without a care, taking himself towards the door. "This is already taking too long."

Wow, he was in such a foul mood, Shizuku thought, ensuring to take note not to piss him off that day. There was no telling what he'd do now that he knew she could regenerate, and she couldn't forget the delight he'd taken in blowing her up either.

The change in the woman's countenance when Deidara stepped outside threw her off balance as she sighed in relief, her hazel eyes double checking the door was shut before approaching Shizuku.

"Come this way," she instructed with a watery smile, gesturing to a space behind her. "This is the men's section."

Nodding, she followed after her, staring up at the clothes in surprise as they undeniably became more feminine the further into the store they went. There were also strange accessories that acted as a divide between the two sections, and curiously, Shizuku reached out, touching the odd white bandages for a moment.

"Are you a shinobi?" she asked quietly, pausing beside a much larger collection of pants than what the men's section had to offer.

She wanted to ask what that meant, but whenever her mouth opened, she was once more plagued with the odd sensation of her tongue being much too big for her mouth. It was unable to form any of the words she needed, every syllable sounding off and feeling _wrong._

"You're scared of him," the light haired woman noted empathetically like she'd only just taken note of her appearance, eyes downcast. "I understand."

Did she? Was she also a captive? Was that what Deidara meant by the deal with their leader?

"Don't worry," she went on to assure her with a kind smile. It was nothing like the one she'd received moments before, where she'd been uncertain and forced it. "I'll make sure he has no reason to get mad at you."

 _Thank you_ , she wanted to say.

Instead, she caught the woman's hand just as she lifted it, holding it in both of hers, hoping that her gratitude was conveyed properly in their strange world.

Fortunately, it was, and she relaxed a little at the softening of her hazel eyes.

"Here," she said while pointing out a pair of pants. "We'll find you something comfortable."

* * *

"Why've you come out in that?" demanded Deidara once she was finished acquiring new clothes. "You should've left it there, yeah."

Rather than antagonising him somehow, Shizuku gestured to her hair and body, having noticed while trying on clothes how filthy she truly was when compared to the other woman. Whereas her light hair was bouncy and neatly trimmed, her own was covered in oils that she previously hadn't cared about, though now couldn't take her mind off. And her body, despite having bathed in rivers, was covered in the crusted blood and dirt from her battle against Deidara and Sasori, frightening the poor woman when she'd seen it all.

"Looks like we're in for an easy day then, yeah," Deidara muttered with a shocking sigh of relief. She followed silently as he began to walk back the way they'd come from, easily navigating the crowds of people who parted for him when they saw who he was. "We've already wasted most of it shopping, of all things."

She wondered if it was possible to salvage the clothes she was already wearing, and her heart sunk as she repeated Deidara's words of throwing them out. Clearly, he had no intention of helping her save them and was more likely to throw them away without her back needing to be turned. Her only hope was Sasori seemingly understanding why she wanted to keep them, just as he'd understood her anguish the night before.

Once they returned to their room, she set her multiple bags down on what she presumed was now her futon. Unlike when she left, it was freshly made with clean sheets and she wondered if it was Sasori who'd changed them while she was gone, for he'd also disappeared from the room. Shizuku hoped he returned soon.

"You already know where the bathroom is," Deidara pointed out. "There's already body wash and whatever else you'll need in there."

Nodding, she left without a fuss, eyes shutting with a sigh of relief as the door shut behind her. Just as it had the night before, everything looked vaguely familiar to her and she made quick work of figuring out the right settings to fill the bath, fingers lingering on a blade resting on the ledge.

* * *

" _Long strokes," her mother instructed. The dark eyes that never missed a detail were focused on her legs, waiting just in case she caught herself like she almost had moments before. "Careful around the ankles, Shizuku. You'll cut yourself."_

* * *

Shizuku eased herself into the hot water after stripping down, leaving her clothes in a pile beside the bath. Steam clung to the entire room, fogging up the mirror above the sink and wetting the tiles surrounding her. Fascination had her reaching out, fingertips grazing the condensation.

The blade was sharp and repeatedly caught the light as it bounced off it, catching her eye.

From the short memories that'd come to her, Shizuku easily understood that she'd been incredibly close with her mother. She'd always admired every side of her, whether it was the strong warrior or the doting mother. It made her wonder when or if she would remember anything about her father, as she still couldn't place a face to the name.

Recalling the memory of how to properly care for herself, Shizuku opened a bottle labelled body wash, smelling the contents though finding herself disappointed at the lack of scent. Although unsure if any products her mother taught her to use smelled, she found herself instinctually upset over it anyway.

It was like a second nature how easily the blade glided over her skin once it was lathered up, and Shizuku found herself relaxing further into the water, deciding to trust her instincts as they guided her through the motions of washing her body and hair.

Up until she encountered the frightened woman in the clothing store, it'd been easy pushing aside what Sasori and Deidara had done to her – no, not pushing aside, but accepting it and her fate, for they were much stronger than herself and the only way out of there, was through them. Sure, Shizuku had planned on going along with their plans until she found some way to escape, but she'd also found herself much too easily accepting their rare kindness too.

Meeting the woman had strengthened her resolve in escaping, reminding Shizuku now whenever she caught sight of the black and red cloaks that they were bad people. Maybe that was how she was supposed to remember their coldness? By looking to the cloaks they were constantly wearing? Was she supposed to associate anyone who wore them as evil and capable of creating harm?

Her two captors had slaughtered an entire village, after all. And that was only moments before they'd blown her limbs off even when she posed no threat to either of them. Yes, Sasori saved her from Uchiha and yes, he comforted her, but did that really outweigh what they'd done?

How many lived in fear like the shop owner did? Did that mean the people she was currently stuck with were the most powerful in their world?

Only once the water cooled did Shizuku reluctantly leave the quiet and relaxing bathroom, ready to face Deidara and his bad mood once more.

"It's about time you got out of there–"

The sudden cutting himself off had her looking to him with a frown, his expression of wide eyed disbelief leaving her frozen for a moment. Had she done something wrong? Pissed him off?

"I know you're naked when you change, but there's nothing to look then!" he snapped, though without much anger that time, she noticed. The strangeness of the moment only increased when he turned his back on her, fists clenched by his sides. "You can't walk around naked when you're a normal person, yeah!"

She couldn't? Frowning and glancing downwards, she tried to spot if there were any major changes besides the size, but she couldn't really spot anything other than having nipples now. Any other part was hidden by the angle of her body, so she could only assume it was the nipples that took him by surprise. Were they really such a big deal? _Why_ were they a big deal? It was just a body part.

"Hurry up and get dressed." Some of the frustration had returned to his voice now, Shizuku realised with a sigh of annoyance. "We've been summoned for a meeting."

A meeting? Wait, we? As in, she was included in that meeting?

"Looks like Zetsu blabbed and so now our leader wants to meet you."

…What?


End file.
